I haven't really posted anything about pregnancy #4, so now that we know what we're having here are some of my thought thus far.
Jeffery and I knew that after having 3 kids so close together, we needed a break. It has been a wonderful experience to have such good boys so close. They are best buds. At times it was been difficult and they have been quite the handfuls, especially when they were younger, but we wouldn't change anything. So now, our break is over. Jeffery reminds me often that it has been 4 1/2 years since I was last pregnant, which means I am 4 1/2 years older and also that this is #4. Things seem just a little bit more difficult than I remember, but once again I am enjoying the experience.
After 3 boys, we were excited at the possibility of having a daughter. However, the Lord has different plans for us and we trust Him. So, we are having another boy. ANOTHER BOY! I have questioned and questioned why I have all boys in the past and I am still not sure why. I love my sons! They are truelly my pride and joy and I would do anything for them. I really love seeing my sons with Jeffery. He is such a good father for boys. One of my favorite times of the week is when we are walking into church. I am surrounded by good looking sons of God. It is during that brief moment that I am reminded that I have been given these children for a special reason, and that I can do it!
So are we excited to be adding yet another boy to our family? Absolutely! I know that he will be a blessing to our family. He has already showed us a little of his personality with the ultrasound. He's active and healthy. His feet are straight and he made sure we knew it. We love him already!
What really bothers me the most about having a boy is people's reactions that its another boy. I won't lie, my feelings have been hurt by people's comments. Yes, of course I would love a daughter, but its not up to us. It is up to a Heavenly Father who knows us, who loves us, who knows what we need, who has a plan for us and our eternal family. And I have faith in Him and His plan. It is the plan of happiness, and that includes the happiness that sons bring to their father and mother.
This post made me cry! I am sure you know I wanted a boy soooo bad with this last pregnancy. Of course we love the children we are sent but it is ok to mourn the loss of what we want - as long as we keep it in perspective!
ReplyDeleteYou are so very blessed to be having another boy! The Lord must trust you so much to give you a future missionary and priesthood holder. People who make comments like that and hurt your feeling obviously have no idea!
I was talking to our Bishop as we chaperoned a Stake Dance when I was pregnant and told him how we had hoped #4 had been a boy and we would be done. He told me that if we would have had a boy and been done - this precious daughter of God would never have made it to our family - which is where we needed her. So maybe our little boy is waiting so that she could have a chance. It really put things in perspective for me. I also know that we are supposed to have another (which a hadn't planned on - I have already had 13 pregnancies)! It is amazing the perspective that comes with prayer!
Anyhow..... sorry for the novella, Just know that you aren't alone. I have a good friend who is also having her #4 boy in April. She feels the EXACT same way as you. We really are all in this together, the situations are different, but the struggles are the same.
I know how you feel, Jenna. Whenever people found out we had three girls, the first thing always asked was if we were going to try for a boy, as if it wasn't good enough to just have girls. We happen to be having a boy, but I would have been just as excited to be having another girl.
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